Breaking the Habit

No, not the Linkin Park song but I can easily think of the song and how nice it is haha. It does however relate.

Hmm. A1! I haven't really talked too much about that whole shebang with anyone. So I guess I'll just put a tiny tidbit here. Lately, I've been waiting to fall into my own little relapse (Since someone else certainly has hah!). In the past, it seemed that when I didn't want to be around her or I was making progress towards being away from her I would eventually fall into a relapse. The type that's totally Dramedy-cliche in the whole "Ah crap I've found out again why I like her so darn much! Phooey!" Lately...It's been waning towards possibly erupting.

But that's the thing.

It's never waned towards. Usually I've had the feeling just dive in and have myself swooning in no time. Now, I'm just...I dunno. It all lies under the three-strikes thing I've trying to propose to myself. That with A1 there were 3 strikes where after the third, I just decided to leave everything be and just move on in life. Don't get me wrong I'm not exactly what you call "over" her. But I'm certainly walking the road. But as many comedy shows would say "Those feelings don't just go away without a trace." That's a matter of debate. But no tangent!

Agustin lately has me wanting to punch him in the face. Although I have totally been an ass to him lately lol. He doesn't bother me as much as I exagerate to him. He's just been in that relapse since Saturday. The day I shall call...THE TURNING OF THE TIDE. Mmm Good name.

I've lately just been actually studying and working on my ukulele. AND I've been working on expanding my knowledge of the world around me. I need to start working out too. D:

Ah. I like now. The present seems like such a gift compared to earlier years. I look forward to weeksdays for school. I likeee school. I completely dread the weekends because of WORK. D: HATE IT. Ish. Gets me money :)

OH! I've completley become an otaku which if you don't know is given below:
Otaku (おたく/オタク?) is a Japanese term used to refer to people with obsessive interests, particularly anime, manga, and video games.

Just that's all I can say. It's horrible. I'M NOT GETTING A LOVE PILLOW THOUGH.

School way funn today. :] I spent a couple hours with Ashley at the library today which was where the idea for this blog came from. It's good to laugh again. Her and Keenan and Phu and Cat and Agustin. People I can easily get a really good laugh with.

Goals!

I don't really have any except for the following:

1. Get good at the Ukulele
2. Do well in school (To the point where I don't think "AH WHAT A CRAP TERM")

I can't really think of anything else...
Plan for OSU? But that's not really a goal as it is something on a to-do list.

Hm. -shrugs-

Also

It was a little...for lack of a better word: weird that Phu got interested about my "baking" life. Or rather after I made some weird comment on "baking" all night. Haha. Mmm curiosity killed the cat!

More of the same.

So I've noticed that I didn't make a reflection-blog this year. I guess I've gotten too old for such a thing now haha. OH WELL. Doesn't mean I won't make one for future purposes though.

So today I got to hang out with Catalina and Daniel And Jennifer and "other people". BUT THEY WERE MOST IMPORTANT. It was a jolly good laughing time. About the strangest things. OH YEAH. NOTE TO SELF: TALK TO THAO ABOUT HER PERFECT GUY LIST. Waaay too ridiculous.

Also Phu actually pissed me off for a full 3 seconds today. All I remember was it was condescending and she was saying how I shuold be pissed and try to prove her wrong academically. And in those 3 seconds I did feel it. I felt everything. Cuss words flew through my mind. Anger flew. And a chance to prove her wrong and prove to myself that I was capable of being at least a decent person will-power wise! And then I felt guilt for feeling such a strong hate. But it felt kinda good. And I do wanna prove her wrong. And prove to myself that I'm able to bring out the best in myself. GRR.

Also. Is it wrong to have people be your motivation? I used to think so. I used to think that I alone should be my only motivation. For some reason that's not proving to be enough. I guess my heart's not into it. Not into me.

And yet hearing Phu saying that she feels disappointed in me...well I don't generally like to let friends down. So I guess this is what I'll have to do! Blargh. Waay too late in life to be working so hard. Blarghies.

Anyways. TIME TO GET STARTED ON BIO HW BEFORE CLASS BEGINS ON MONDAY.